I recently started reading The Geography of Bliss by Eric Weiner (which may or may not have been the book I purchased online). It’s about Eric’s journey as he travels the world trying to find the happiest place on earth. In his search he goes to the Netherlands, India, Iceland, Moldova, Thailand…and a stack of other places. It really is an amazing book, and even though I’m not going to go into detail about it (although I would love to), it should definitely make your must read list.

But it got me thinking, what about Australia? I wonder what we would rate on the happiness scale – yes, it does actually exist. As I was trying to figure out what we Aussies have going for us, I stumbled upon a much bigger question: why is everyone so obsessed with finding happiness? It seems simple – everyone wants to be happy. In fact it’s the one thing that connects all of us together, our shared interest in being legitimately happy. My query is though, why do we have search for it?

I believe that everyone has the answers to their own problems, they just can’t be bothered figuring it out. Ultimately we all know what we really want; we know what will make us happy. Whether it’s superficial happiness or long lasting, there is something getting in the way of our search. Guilt and morality seem to be blocking our road to happiness. But in truth, we let it.

Right now, what would make you happy? Actually think about it. For me, it’s chocolate and a bottle of wine (not just a glass). But what stops me, and I’m guessing a lot of you too, is the thoughts of ‘I shouldn’t, that’s so bad, so irresponsible’. Since when did impulsive become irresponsible? There’s always a reason which stops us in our tracks from making the happier choice. The bottom line – we’re self sabotaging our right to happiness. And guilt just doesn’t seem to be a good enough reason.

I don’t understand why we’re made to feel horrible if we chose a night on the couch and skip out on a party. If we’re all looking for happiness then why do we impose, and let others impose, this guilt on us?

Maybe these things are only considered as a superficial happiness, something that is instantly gratifying and makes you smile for a day. But isn’t it easier to look at life as a series of moments – and isn’t it so much better if these moments are positive instead of filled with obligation? Maybe long term happiness is based on being happy in the interim. Yet we’re so self indulged with guilt, any happy moment we create for ourselves can be tarnished instead of purely enjoyed.

What makes me really curious is our Aussie attitude. ‘She’ll be right’ is such a great motto to live by; it definitely reduces stress. But I’m sick of just being ‘right’, I want to be amazed. We always take everything as it comes and go out of our way to accommodate the needs of others. Maybe it’s time to think about our own needs, however silly they may sound. And go with what feels good for us, not what is good for everyone else. We’re so terrified of being seen as selfish, that we’ve gone too far the other way. We’re selfless. And it’s not a healthy way to live. Like they say – everything in moderation.

Maybe this is just a way for me to justify buying a one way ticket to the United Kingdom, but I think it has a lot of merit. The next time you’re left feeling guilty about a decision, get over it, and choose the option that makes you happiest. There’s no point in doing something you don’t particularly want to, you’ll end up ruining it for everyone else. Besides, the happier you are the happier the people around you will be. And when you think about it like that, it’s hardly a selfish decision.

Instead of feeling guilty about skipping the gym today, I’m going to go and crack open that bottle of wine.

Cat Brooke is a final-year Bachelor of Creative Arts student at La Trobe University and is part of upstart‘s editorial team. You can follow her on Twitter: @CathrynBrooke