Under the Saturday morning sun at Joe’s Market Garden, a group of strangers gather. Their nervousness is palpable as they embark on an unusual adventure. For the next two hours, these 26 strangers will be participating in “weed dating”, a playful twist on traditional speed dating. Instead of engaging in small talk over dinner and drinks, participants get their hands dirty and tend to a garden together. Amidst laughter and awkward introductions, connections quietly blossom.

In a world dominated by swiping left, right, and endlessly scrolling through profiles, the search for meaningful connections is becoming increasingly daunting. But in the garden beds of urban farms and on the courts of casual sports games, individuals are given the opportunity to meet others in a way that feels more organic and—hopefully— less awkward. Lately, we have seen a range of unique face-to-face singles meet-up options, from run clubs and “date and dance” to even using fruit in a supermarket to communicate what someone is looking for. These unconventional events are not only reinvigorating the dating landscape but also transforming the social scene.  

The weed dating event is run by environmental non-profit organisation CERES. For Jenna Tomkins the weed dating event was the perfect opportunity to meet like-minded people while engaging in a hobby she’d been eager to return to. 

“I felt like it’d be an approachable way to enter dating, because I’m like, surely there [are] decent people that are also willing to be in the dirt and be gardening,” she tells upstart.   

Gardening has been shown to enhance overall health and wellbeing. Just 20 minutes in nature can reduce stress hormones and encourage patience and acceptance. Tomkins, who navigated her first public dating event, found the shared act of weeding to be a “mindful” practice, which made the experience feel natural. 

“I forgot that I didn’t know these people,” she says. “It’s just kind of like, ‘I’m doing this, and he’s just someone talking to me about stuff’. It felt like most of the conversations flowed really nicely.” 

Asia Brownlie, the weed dating facilitator, says that these events are tailored to niche interests, attracting strangers who share a common thread. This not only helps spark conversations and build companionship but serves as a distraction if the conversation happens to be stilted. 

“The main feedback I get is that people enjoy having something to do,” she tells upstart. “It helps avoid the intense, prolonged eye contact with someone you don’t know when you’re just sitting across the table, not doing anything.”  

Alexandra Cole runs a social sports singles event. Almost 90 percent of Australian adults participate in sport at least once a year, and so, creating an event centred around it seemed like a no-brainer. She also points out how it removes the stigma often associated with attending a speed dating event.  

“Sports [is] the ultimate icebreaker, be it dating or politics, it’s the one thing that I think people can get in and have fun with, without any expectations,” she tells upstart.   

“If you put a ball in front of them, a lot of those nerves and barriers to, ‘oh, I’m going to a speed dating event, gross’, disappear. If you say, ‘I’m just going to play basketball with a bunch of friends’, it feels different.”  

When it comes to choosing the sport, Cole says she thinks outside of the box. Instead of opting for your typical basketball or netball match, she leans towards nostalgic activities like t-ball, dodge ball and other games many Aussies grew up playing. This sense of nostalgia fosters a fun, relaxed atmosphere, making it easier for people to bond over shared memories and experiences rather than competition.  

Activities like gardening and sports nurture deeper connections, and playfulness, build lasting memories, help you focus on the present and remove those barriers typical to formal dating. Unconventional dating experiences are gaining popularity, largely because, as Brownlie notes, online dating sites are increasingly viewed as impersonal, transactional, and exhausting for many. 

“People are just really over [the] dating apps and over that sort of culture of treating people like they’re quite disposable,” she says.   

Nearly half of Australians aged 18 to 40 use at least one dating app, yet over half have faced burnout from failed dates and disappointments. Along with these apps, however, come various concerns as nearly 47 percent of users have faced safety threats. The most common incidents include financial scams, sexual threats, and in-person abuse. Another 33 percent of users have encountered creepy or unsettling behaviour, this includes the 28 percent that have received unsolicited inappropriate or explicit content. 

Cole’s social sports singles event is password-protected for safety reasons. She explains this system allows her to monitor who attends. If something goes wrong, she can quickly act and ban the individual from future events. Attendees must also be recommended by someone, ensuring an extra layer of trust and accountability. 

“It may make it seem a bit elitist, but I’d rather [do] it that way than put someone in danger,” she says. 

The absence of alcohol also offers a refreshing way to meet potential partners, which according to Brownlie, many participants appreciate. 

“For a lot of people, a noisy bar can be really overstimulating, plus the anxiety of meeting a new person is a lot to deal with at once,” she says. 

While many participants attend these events in search of romantic love, they often leave with newfound friendships. On top of meeting like-minded individuals and reconnecting with nature, Tomkins appreciates the ambiance of the urban farm, and how it cultivates an environment for true self-expression. 

“I felt like I could just be my true self and didn’t have to pretend to be this glamorous person that I’m not.” 

Article: Amelia Pozdzik is a second-year Bachelor of Media and Communication (Sports Media & Marketing) student at La Trobe University. You can follow her on Twitter @Amelia_Pozdzik